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Keelay Blogs Birmingham
This weekend, I (Keelay, for those of you title skippers) will be headed to Birmingham, Alabama for Birmingham-Southern College’s Latin American Studies Symposium. This is my first time to Alabama, so I don’t exactly know what to expect, but I hear they love the gov’nuh there.
Be on the lookout for more on this trip as I update periodically.
This week on Subliminy Cricket!
I hope you all enjoyed last week’s special edition of Subliminy Cricket with Furman President Dr. Shi. If you haven’t subscribed to our podcast on iTunes, do so and you won’t regret it (probably)!
Tune in to our show this weekend, April 18th for:
-Kyle’s Absence (More on that to come)
-Things that tickle McClintock’s fancy
(Cold War, Vaclav Havel, South Caroliniana, and the latest from C.S. Lewis)!
-Some music that hopefully doesn’t suck
-Pimps and Pimp Slaps
-Weird News
Along with our special guest star: your affable, yet slightly nerdy kidney
BREAKING NEWS: WILL SMITH TO ADDRESS GIRAFFEGATE
PACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
This just in: Will Smith will address Giraffegate allegations this week on Subliminy Cricket. Tune in at 11:00 to hear his press conference. Stay tuned for more information as it comes in to the Subliminy Cricket news desk.
National Championship Real-Time Blog
VS.
Hope everyone has had a great Easter break. We (Keelay and Will Smith) are back on campus to blog the National title game with you. Keep refreshing as we write what comes to our collective mind throughout the telecast.
9:07Tip-off is set for 9:21. Why the hell can’t big sporting events start at a normal time? It works out just fine ALL throughout the regular season.
9:16John Scheyer and Brad Stevens. Long lost brothers? Think about it.
9:20Why does Butler have an actual bulldog on the court? I hope Duke doesn’t have a devil…
9:59 McClintock claims the legitimacy of NC State’s basketball program by citing the 1950’s.
10:01 Keelay says that Jukes is the best basketball name ever.
10:10 With NO coaxing, McClintock admits NC State sucks. We head into halftime, 33-32 Duke leading. After the teams trade threes going into intermission.
10:20 McClintock can’t figure out 2×11.
10:21 CBS shows Bob Huggins nearly making out with his star player again. Still more and more disturbing each time. Also, McClintock claims that Greg Gumbel is the “less famous Gumbel.” I (Keelay) disagree.
Thoughts, dear cricketeers?
10:27 Bubba from Forrest…err Nolan Smith’s mom is on TV talking about shrimp…err how proud she is of her son. Greg Gumbel asks her who she’s rooting for in the dumbest joke of the night so far.
10:43 MILFNETS! Howard does not look like he belongs on a basketball court. More like… a geico commercial. Fouling Zoubek, so easy a caveman could do it. Big three by Nored to put Butler up one. Big shots galore!
10:48 McClintock calls everyone in Louisiana slow, except for Governor Bobby Jindal. He’s “supah fast.”
10:51 Will Smith breaks out the chocolate covered bacon. Side note: the woman on the back of the package is far too attractive for chocolate or bacon, let alone the unholy combination of the two.
10:52 McClintock breaks out the defibrillator. Just in case.
11:01 Jim Nantz says “This place is electric.” with no enthusiasm whatsoever. Hayward gets rejected by the rim. Two point game, 15 lead changes, and 7 ties. Butler is hanging in there.
Duke’s black players have the whitest names ever. Lance Thomas and Nolan Smith. Maybe Coach K hasn’t heard of the Internet and still uses recruiting magazines, scouring the nation for the top pale talent and feels bad rescinding scholarship offers after he meets them.
11:05 Russell Crowe as Robin Hood? Really?
11:06 Will Smith flashes McClintock. Things get weird.
11:12 Some weird discussion on Midwestern geography and STDs.
11:15 Hayward is fouled hard and is sent to the line. McCintock buries his face in the futon crease, which according to preliminary reports “smells funny.” One might wonder why he’s still there…
11:18 Beyonce’s “Crazy in Love” comes on. Still trying to figure this one out.
11:24 Ring Pops were overrated. As was the one that opened like a chapstick. They had a poor stickiness to quality ratio. Disappointing in hindsight.
11:27 Three point game with a minute and a half left. Butler with the ball, looking to tie. WHAT A GAME!
11:31 Zoubs kicks the ball out of bounds, shot clock is off, Butler down 1. Time out. 13 seconds left.
11:37 Hayward rims out from half-court as time expires. Duke wins 61-59. Amazing game. Commentator says that there was no loser, but I’m not so sure Brad Stevens and the Lost Boys would agree with that statement.
We’re signing off now. Hope you guys have enjoyed the game and our coverage. It’s been real. We’ll see you guys on Sunday!
WPLS Special Report
Last week, during our 3/28 show, co-host Will Smith claimed to have been attacked by a giraffe at Disney World’s Animal Kingdom when he was eight years old. However, according to unnamed sources at Disney, Animal Kingdom did not open operations until April 22nd, 1998—a date confirmed by Wikipedia. Will Smith, however, would have been nine years old the date of the grand opening! Though a spokesperson for Smith could not be reached for comment, his parents have said they are very disappointed and that they “didn’t raise a liar.”
We here at Subliminy Cricket await an honest and forthcoming reply from Mr. Smith. It is our sincere hope that he can bring a swift end to Giraffegate 2010.
Pizza Emerges Victorious in Subliminy Cricket Tournament!
In today’s final showdowns for the Bracket of Awesomeness, Pizza emerged as the overall champion. In the Elite Eight, Ghostbusters (Fictional Characters), Wikipedia (Internet Stuff), Train (Music), and Pizza (Food) won their respective brackets. In the Final Four, Ghostbusters beat Wikipedia (over McClintock’s objections) and Train fell to Pizza. In overtime, Pizza squeaked out a clutch victory over Ghostbusters to win the whole tournament.
We thank all of the mostly inanimate and fictional participants in our Subliminy Cricket Bracket of Awesomeness!
#1 in Furman Morning Radio since 2009! 